


Blackmail [Hiatus]

by Lauren_Elizabeth108



Category: Little Mix (Band), One Direction (Band), Radio 1 RPF
Genre: Depressed Louis, Depression, F/F, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Multiple Personality Disorder, Protective Liam, Self Harm, Smut, Unrequited Love, larry - Freeform, noble harry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-12-28
Updated: 2013-12-29
Packaged: 2018-01-06 10:55:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1105971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lauren_Elizabeth108/pseuds/Lauren_Elizabeth108
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'How far would you go to save the one you love? Would you steal, lie, leave them broken but safe? Or would you have them with you, yet in danger for as long as they lived? What would you chose?'</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. From the Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction and feedback would be greatly appreciated  
> ~ Lauren xx
> 
> (Obviously this is a work of fiction and I don't own One Direction or anyone affiliated with the band)

Louis sighed at the computer screen, wishing that all those stories and videos were true. He really needed to stop torturing himself, but he couldn't help it. _I must be a masochist_ , he thought, continuing to look at the Tumblr blogs and Youtube videos dedicated to his and Harry’s 'bromance' Larry Stylinson. How he ached for it to be real. Louis loved him. He knew he did. Yet he couldn't tell Harry. How was he supposed to say it? "Hey Harry - I've been in love with you for two years now and you're the reason I broke up with Eleanor. Just wanted you to know in case there was the smallest chance you feel the same." Yeah, that would go down really well. Not. Louis snorted derisively and closed the computer.

Wandering out of his room to the kitchen, in search of something to eat, he spied a plate of chocolate chip cookies, courtesy of Harry earlier this morning. Bingo. Louis bit into one, moaning as it hit his tastebuds. Harry was the best cook he knew - aside from his own mum, of course.

He continued to chew on the cookie absentmindedly, staring out the window at the typical London weather. It was raining, just like it was the day Louis realised he loved Harry.

 

**FLASHBACK**

The five lads were all sitting around Liam's on a Saturday. It was too rainy to do anything but stay inside. Niall was complaining about being hungry, even though they'd only eaten maybe an hour before. Harry volunteered to make Niall something to eat, only if they all promised to watch Love Actually afterwards. Liam and Zayn groaned the result of seeing that movie one too many times. Niall readily agreed, nodding his head vigorously. Harry motioned for Louis to follow him. He got up from his place on the lounge and walked behind him into the kitchen.

"Feel like giving me a hand Boobear?" Louis sighed internally. This was going to be hard. he'd felt his feelings for Harry slowly change into something more, yet he still wasn't ready to admit to himself - let alone anyone else. But it wasn't love. It couldn't be. Louis was bi; so sure, he'd had crushes on boys before. But he had never truly loved anyone.

Louis realised Harry was still waiting for an answer, so he nodded his head and grabbed the recipe book from the kitchen counter.

They ended up making chocolate chip cookies. Harry put the last batch in the oven while Louis cleaned up, very out of character for him. He wasn't ready to leave the kitchen - and Harry, but he didn't really know what to say, in case he accidentally slipped up and said something he would regret.

Harry’s voice broke his concentration. "You've been really quiet Lou. Is everything alright?" The boy in question turned to the sound of the deep voice and jumped when he saw the object of his affection standing right next to him, closer than he had expected. Those mesmerising eyes seemed to draw him in, endless depths of emerald green. Louis swore he could stare at them for days and never get bored. They seemed to always change colour, anywhere from deep green to pale blue, depending on the light. Harry’s eyes were one of the things he loved most about him.

"See something you like?" Harry whispered, voice husky.

The Doncaster bred man blushed and looked away unwillingly. "N-No. I was just . . . thinking."

Harry stroked his chin thoughtfully. "You're too serious lately. You need some fun." And with that he took a handful of flour and tossed it over Louis, staining his black and white striped shirt and red pants with the white powder.

The flour covered man gasped in mock horror. "Oh, no you didn't!" Reaching behind him and snatching an egg off the bench, swiftly breaking it on his head. He grinned manically and declared war. The kitchen soon looked like a bomb had hit it. There were all sorts of foods everywhere, covering the walls, cupboards and ceiling. Louis crash tackled Harry to the floor, straddling him in the process, planning to tickle him into submission, when the elder got distracted again by his eyes. He stared at Harry for a few minutes and he gazed back with an unfamiliar emotion in his eyes. Louis moved in slightly and the boy beneath him tilted his head in response. _Is this really going to happen?_ he thought, butterflies erupting in his stomach. Just before their lips touched, they’re startled by someone clearing their throat. Louis looked up guiltily. Liam and Zayn were standing in the doorway. Zayn raising his eyebrow in question and Liam looked annoyed. No, pissed would be a better word. "What are you guys doing?! I thought you were cooking, not having a food fight! I just cleaned the kitchen this morning! Now I'll have to clean it - again!"

Louis hung his head in shame. "Sorry Liam. Really, I am. Haz and I will clean it up, promise." Both boys cleaned the kitchen after giving Niall his cookies as promised. But Harry wouldn't meet Louis’ eyes for the rest of the day. He knew something was wrong, but he also knew that he could no longer hide the fact that he was in love with Harry Edward Styles.

 

**END FLASHBACK**

"Louis?" Liam's voice startled him out of his thoughts, resulting in Louis dropping the half-eaten cookie on the floor. He looked up at Liam, slightly annoyed. "You made me drop my cookie!"

He grinned sheepishly. "Sorry Lou. I actually just came by to check on you and make sure you're alright." His tone was soothing and full of concern. Louis didn't believe he was here 'just to check up' on him without there being some genuine problem. His thoughts immediately turned to Harry. Liam was the only one he'd confided in about his feelings for Harry, and Liam's usually the one who comforts him when he hooks up with some random slut at a bar or gets a new girlfriend - which is often. Louis narrowed his eyes in realisation. "What happened Liam?" he asked, enunciating his words clearly.

Big brown eyes filled with pity, Liam wordlessly handed over a magazine, opened to an interview with Caroline Flack. Louis skimmed through it, heart stopping when he read that she had gotten back together with Harry. He felt Liam's arms wrap around him, but he felt numb inside. How could Harry go back to her, after the way she had treated him? He was heartbroken when she ended it, severing all contact with him. "Please tell me this is a joke Li." Louis’ voice was hoarse and cracked towards the end, a sign of the tears he was struggling to hold back.

Shaking his head, Liam only spoke three words, but those three words broke his heart. "I'm sorry Lou."


	2. Daydreams and Surprises

It had been a week since Louis had found out about Harry and _her_. It's been a week that he'd been avoiding Harry. He hasn't really noticed since he's barely around, spending all his time with the she-devil. She'd hurt him so badly last time and now he's just suddenly forgiven her? What is going on inside that curly boy's head? He clearly doesn't remember the hours Louis had spent consoling him after their break up. He was heartbroken because, well - she wasn't exactly nice about it. 

 

Louis shook his head. There's something not right about this. That's probably because you don't want to believe it the nagging voice in his head told him. Shut up! I just don't want him to get hurt. He deserves better than her anyway. She's way too old for him. 

 

Exhaling loudly, the frustrated man stood, walking out to the kitchen. Chocolate always help him think, this is not an exception. He opens the fridge and grabs a block of chocolate clearly labelled 'LOUIS' in large writing. It's his chocolate, and Louis honestly is not really willing to share it.

 

Biting into the chocolate absentmindedly, the 21-year-old wandered over to the lounge and sat down, not realising that the TV was on. He stared at it, eyes unfocused, as his thoughts ran around his head furiously. After about five minutes, the chorus of Dashboard Confessional's 'As Lovers Go' sounded from his phone, signalling that he had received a text. Pulling out said phone, he glanced down at the screen expecting to see Liam's name lit up. Louis' stomach dropped and his heart stopped for a few seconds when he saw Harry's name. 

 

**From Hazzaaaaa :)**

hey louis, we need to talk. meet me at three at the park? 

 

No smiley faces, no abbreviations, using his full name. Harry sounded serious. Louis could feel the worry start to build in his stomach. He glanced at the phone again, noting the time. 1:30pm. Only one and a half hours until he had to meet Harry. Quickly sending an affirmative reply, Louis laid back on the couch and tried to relax, putting his earphones in and letting the familiar sound of Boys Like Girls thump through the earphones, numbing his skull.

“

It's too late, baby, there's no turning around. I've got my hands in my pocket and my head in a cloud. This is how I do when I think about you. I never thought that you could break me apart. I keep a sinister smile and a hold of my heart. You want to get inside, then you can get in line. But not this time.”

 

He just lay there, letting his dreams run wild. Harry smiling when he saw him, telling Louis that he was through with Caroline. "Because I love you Boobear. I always have and I always will." Louis smiled. "I love you too, Hazzabear. God I love you so much." His eyes sparkled with happiness as he leaned in and pressed his lips softly against the smaller boy's. Louis kissed him back gently and wrapped his arms around his neck as his hands found their way to Louis' hips. "Mine" He whispered in Harry's ear possessively. 

 

The Yorkshire lad groaned when he pulled himself from the fantasy. He really needed to stop putting himself through this. Checking the time, he swore and snatched his phone from the floor where it had fallen during his mini-nap and headed out. The park was only five minutes from the house, so Louis turned left onto the footpath that would lead him to the tree in the centre of the park. Throwing his hands forcefully into his jacket pockets, Louis made his way slowly, scuffing his shoes and kicking random pebbles along the footpath. 

 

And lo and behold, the tree soon came into sight. The very same tree where he first admitted that he loved Harry out loud. Louis slowly slid down the tree until he was sitting with his back against the trunk. "Lou?" Louis turned his head to see the brilliant green eyes that he loved so but they were different from when he'd last seen them. They no longer sparkled with life, but were rather dull and lifeless. This sent warning bells ringing in his head. If you were in love, which Harry allegedly was, weren't you supposed to look happy? Eyes shining, smiling all the time and all that jazz? Harry was a far cry from happy. Hell, he didn't even look healthy. His hair was limp and hopelessly tangled. His skin was pale and slightly blotchy and his cheekbones had gained more definition due to an unhealthy amount of recent weight loss. 

 

Louis frowned. "Harry, are you alright? Because, honestly, you don't look alright." He laughed. A short, hard laugh. "I'm fine Lou. I promise. Just a bit stressed with all the publicity and criticism I've been getting lately." Louis frowned again and stood up. "Why are you getting criticism for? Sure, Caroline's a little too old for you, but honestly, age is just a number." Oh God, what am he saying? Now would be a good time to shut up Lou. "Trust me Harry, everything will get better, I promise."

 

He snorted and muttered something under his breath. "Look, Lou. There's something I need to tell you. . . but I'm not really sure how you're going to take it. Please don't hate me." His eyes showed his fear of Louis hating him - as if that was a very real possibility to him. If only he knew the truth. He couldn't hate Harry, no matter what he did. 

 

"Just tell me Harry. Honestly, how bad could it be?"

 

Harry stared into Lou's beautiful blue-grey eyes. He always worried about Harry more than any of the other lads did. Louis knew him so well; it was like he was Harry. Louis could tell if he needed to talk or just to be held until he felt better. There was no one else in the world that could compare to his Boobear. 

Taking a deep breath, struggling to calm his shaking nerves, Harry steeled himself for Louis' response. Louis was the most sensitive one. His emotions were fragile, he put all of him into every relationship he had, which is one of the reasons he takes time trusting people. This had to be the hardest thing Harry'd ever done. "I'mmovinginwithCaroline," He said it all in one breath, hoping against hope that Louis heard it and wasn't going to ask him to repeat it. He wore a look of complete confusion and he scratched the back of his neck. "Sorry Haz, but would you mind repeating that, y'know, a bit more slowly?" 

 

"I'm moving in with Caroline." Harry watched with sorrow as he saw the sadness appear on his face. God he wished there was another way, but sadly there wasn't. This was the only way he can think of to protect him. Louis was the one who was delicate. He put on a good front, while on the inside he was dying. And when he was alone, he'd break, crying until he had no more tears to cry and passed out, exhausted. Harry had spent many nights comforting him when the haters got to him, telling him he was ugly, couldn't sing and he should go die and save everyone the trouble. He remembered feeling so angry that he just wanted to punch their faces in and scream at them, telling them exactly what he think of them for calling my best friend all those hurtful words. 

 

 Harry tried to look into Lou's eyes, but he refused to look up from the ground. "Lou -" "It’s fine Harry. I wish you happiness with her." He stopped as a sudden thought occurred to him. "We'll still be able to hang out all the time right?" He bit his lip, nervously waiting for the other boy's answer. And really, how could Harry say no? "Of course Boo." He folded Louis into a tight hug, nuzzling in against his neck. I'm sorry Lou. I wish you could see why this has to happen. 

 

***********************

 

Harry carefully placed the last of my belongings into a cardboard box and sealed it with tape. Today was the day he'd had been dreading ever since he had agreed to it. Why was he so fucking stupid?! Because of his complete idiocy, everything was changing - and it wasn't for the better. A soft knock sounded at his door.

 

 "Harry?" Lou's voice was small and pitifully frail. Harry walked over to the door and opened it halfway. Lou stood there, face pale and concerned. "come in, Boo," he opened the door wide and he walked passed me and headed for the bed. Smiling at how predictable he is, Harry shut the door and turned to face him. "What's up, Lou?" he asked gently, recognising how vulnerable the smaller man is. He drew in a small, shuddering breath and held it in for a few seconds before releasing it slowly. "Ha-Have I done something wrong, Hazza? Is that why you're leaving? Because I promise I didn't mean to. I'll never do it again and I'll be nice to Caroline and I won't bug you all the time and - and - and I do whatever it takes to get you to stay! You're my best friend!" The words just burst out of Louis, tears slowly streaking down his face. Harry's heart broke, right then and there. He had never considered Lou's view of this.

 

He pulled Louis into a gentle hug and rubbed soothing circles on his back. "Boobear, I promise you, you've done nothing wrong. You are the perfect housemate and I hate that I have to leave you, but this I have to do this." He sighed before asking a final question. "Do you love her?" Harry didn't. God he wished it was him he was with, instead of Caroline. He's loved Lou for so long, he honestly can't imagine ever loving someone the way he loves him. He's Harry's other half, the only person who knows and understands him. Not even his own mother knows him as well as Louis does. But he's straight. And even if he wasn't, he would never return Harry's feelings. Louis was perfection come to life. His eyes were the most beautiful part of him. They say the eyes are the window to the soul. If that's what Lou's eyes are like, his soul must be the purest form of good on this planet. 

 

Harry forced a smile and nodded. "Yes, I do. I love her very much." How he wanted to say "it's you I love". Louis gave a curt nod and wished him happiness with her before he left the room quickly. 

 

The smile dropped off Harry's face as soon as Louis left and he slumped against the wall, resigned to his fate. If only Lou knew. He'd understand, Harry argued against himself. But you know it's forbidden. Telling him could hurt him more than this will. At least you'll be able to see him still if this all works out the way they say it will. Sighing heavily, he sat on the floor and pulled his knees up to his chest. Why was this so hard? He felt the tears forming so he dropped my head to rest on his knees and cried. Huge gulping sobs that left him unable to breathe but Harry couldn't stop. The tears he was crying were full of all the pain, love and anger that he had stored in his body and he just couldn't hold it in anymore. After crying his heart out for a good two hours, the Cheshire boy closed his eyes for only a brief second, but before he realised what was happening, he's fallen asleep, fighting the dream that he had been dreaming ever since this nightmare started.

 

Caroline.

 


End file.
